I’m currently in phase four of my quit smoking app and must wait an hour and twenty minutes between smokes. It’s already getting a little tougher and every time I think about giving up cigarettes entirely I feel panic. I’ve been thinking about why that is.
I started smoking at the ripe old age of eleven and am now in my early fifties. Being a smoker is tightly wrapped up in my identity as a human being. Quitting smoking is like quitting a part of me. Who will I be without my cigarettes? The answer to that question remains to be seen and the good news is I don’t have to figure it all out right this second; there are plenty more phases to go through before the end. I now understand that my identity as a smoker is a part of my stupid addiction.
Smoking surrounds everything I do; before and after tasks; first thing in the morning and last thing at night; right after meals. What will I do besides smoke? Well, it takes twenty one days to form a new habit and that’s what I will have to do. I’m not a hundred percent sure what that will look like but doing the dishes after a meal instead of smoking, doing yoga and meditation first thing in the morning and before bed look like good places to start while I’m still allowed to smoke fairly frequently.
I’m also deliberately breaking some habits that go along with smoking. My morning coffee is no longer accompanied by a cigarette and I move on to the next task or read a little instead of smoking directly after finishing a task. I sometimes further delay going out for a smoke even though my app says I can. These strategies should make the transition to phase five a little easier.
My Phoenix Rising 