I’m moving in a little over a week and while I’m excited to be moving to a big sexy house I’m also quite stressed out. I’ve moved several times in my life and have always been the chill person, not worrying too much about the packing and such, I always got it done in time. But there is something different about this move. I can’t quite put my finger on why but I have more anxiety than ever before. I’m even having funky dreams about the whole ordeal. Maybe it’s because I’ve never used movers before.
I have more than half of the apartment packed already but it doesn’t feel like it. I fret over all the stuff that isn’t packed yet. I have a fear that the movers will arrive and we won’t be ready, we’ll run out of boxes with no time to get more. I try to calculate how many more of what size boxes we’ll need to finish the packing. I go through this worry cycle several times a day and it’s exhausting.
Although we are moving in the middle of the month we are paid up to the end of the month which means I don’t have to worry about cleaning until after we’ve left. My brain and nervous system don’t believe me and so I often get this feeling that I need to start the cleaning immediately or it won’t be done in time for a final inspection by the landlord.
Everything about this move feels super urgent but it really isn’t. There’s not much packing left and there’s tons of time to clean. So how am I coping with the anxiety? I’m teaching myself how to knit by perfecting one stitch before moving on to the next. I’m teaching myself macrame; I picked up a kit with a simple project for beginners and only have to learn two knots. My art suff is all packed but I do have a colouring book which helps soothe the nerves.
Working out these feelings isn’t just one and done. As I’ve said, I go through this cycle several times a day which means I have to cool my jets several times a day. On the bright side I’m getting lots of practice at self-regulation and soothing my nervous system.
My Phoenix Rising 